Hello, I’m Mel, and I’m an ablutionizer.
I’ll admit it. I am a real sucker for toiletries of all kinds. I not only adore soaps, lotions, and various preparations, but also the way they smell and way they are packaged. The purchase of a bottle of body wash has been known to jolt me out of boredom, as much as the ensuing use of it has calmed my frazzled nerves. The product itself is rarely anything really special, it’s more the ritual that accompanies the acquisition and use that matters. I know it’s pathetic, but as long as companies continue to scoop stuff out of the same old vat, give it a new scent and color, I will be there with debit card in hand.
There are, however, some products that actually transcended fetish status because they really work and I could not, would not, want to do without them. Following is my Top Pick List of grooming products. Prices are approximate.
One’n'Only Shiny Silver
Ultra Shine Spray
$5 at Sally Beauty Supply
One of my great fears is that one day they may stop making this spray. Those of us with gray/silver hair get short shrift when it comes to good products, because anyone who lets their hair go gray has given up and doesn’t care about looks, right? Wrong! This spray, applied to unconditioned, towel-dried hair gives great tangle control and a wonderful, verging- on-metallic silvery sheen that only gets better as the hair dries. The only downside is that you need to be really careful not to broadcast the spray too widely as it makes the bathroom floor really slippery.
There’s a wonderful book on the subject called “Going Gray-What I Learned About Beauty, Sex, Work, Motherhood, Authenticity and Everything Else That Really Matters” by Anne Kreamer.
John Freida Frizz-Ease
Clearly Defined Style Holding Gel
$4.50 drugstores/big boxes
Again, the color issue is at play. Gray/white hair shows buildup of products because it has little or no pigment, so stripping it of residue and use of products that are very clear is really important. This gel is light, strong, clear and doesn’t smell like cheap incense. It really holds a sleek look without sporting, what my husband has always called, the helmet head. Years ago I used a product called Tenax, that made my hair so hard, you could knock on it with your knuckles and it made a sound!
Softsoap For Men
Active Moisturizing Body Wash
$3.50 drugstores/big boxes
Maybe this is the reason I get so much spam at work about penis enlargement. They know I’m using a man’s soap. Actually, the clean, invigorating smell is not the only good thing here, it’s truly a moisturizing wash. You don’t feel tight and rough after bathing, and in the harsh conditions of winter, that’s really saying something. Not sure what the secret is here, but I tried the girly-smelling ones they make, and they just did not perform the same. Don’t send a girl to do a man’s job.
Olay Body
Quench Body Lotion
$7 drugstores/big boxes
Ever since trying Oil of Olay years ago, I have generally been disappointed with all of Olay’s products. They work okay, but they have strange textures and smell funny. That’s a deal breaker for me. But Quench is truly different. It goes on non-greasy, and really, really lasts. You can feel the benefits of it the next day, which I think is truly notable in a product. One thing I wish they’d do is stop changing the various incarnations of Quench, jumping around between chamomile, aloe, cocoa butter, firming, brightening, sunless tanner… I get one I like then it’s given way to another skin fad. And they all smell different, some very pleasant, but others with a faint bouquet of Play Doh. Just do the smell test before committing.
Pond’s Dry Skin Cream
$4 drugstores/big boxes
There is a dizzying array of cheaper (under $40) face creams on the market. I’ve tried a few here and there, largely based on reviews from Allure magazine, and have never come away with one that deserves to be on my list. So then I spend a few months using hand cream on my face until I try again. This time, I decided to go with a plain, old face cream that touted no firming, wrinkle-reducing, or brightening… just good old-fashioned moisture. I was pleasantly surprised with how well this product worked for me. It has a satiny, yet not slippery feel, absorbs well, and has a very clean, old-school cosmetic smell… soapy and clean. If it was good enough for most of our moms, it’s probably OK for us too.
Hawaiian Tropic Lime Coolada
After Sun Moisturizer
Don’t remember the price – cannot find it this year : (
I am actually embarrassed to admit that I like a product with such a ridiculous name. Hey, would you wear a perfume named Comic Sans? But I bought this stuff last year, during the last sad days of pool life, to preserve my pathetic tan, and grew to love the feel and smell of it. It not only reminds me of the wonderful warmth of the sun at the local pool, but moisturizes like a beast! It’s light green, which is kind of festive, and has hints of suntan lotion underneath the citrusy, coconutty notes. Great on elbows and heels at bedtime for sweet dreams of swimming.
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